The Last Snowflake

The Last Snowflake

Spring came early
in February;
sunny days, blue skies,
cumulous clouds abound.
Sweater weather, shorts and sandals,
daffodils were teased above ground.

That was yesterday.
Now I drive in a squall
counting the snowflakes, 
wondering when I'll see
the last snowflake  fall.

The Art of Listening

I grew up hearing my grandfather say that God gave us two ears and one mouth for a reason: we should listen twice as much as we talk. There is nowhere more apparent for this need as there is in large group settings.

As writers we are often isolated in pursuit of our endeavors and need the social interaction with those of our own ilk – yes, I did say ilk!  No one understands another writer like other writers.  And when we do get together it is understandable that we are excited to talk shop.  I’ve often gone home from our meetings excited about what we’ve discussed and eager to write.  When there is an emotional connection, a coming together of the minds, we recharge creatively, and that’s a good thing.  But oftentimes during the course of the evening, our enthusiasm gets the better of us and there is less of a give-and-take in the conversation as one or a few people often end up dominating the conversation, however interesting tangents those might be. 

The part the moderator plays in any given meeting is 1) to keep the conversation going and on track,  2) make sure everyone gets a chance to speak – being sensitive to those who can’t seem to get a word in edgewise! And 3) leading with questions, but not talking about themselves and their own writing unless specifically asked.  I understand the “me-too!” quotient – this is a form of identifying with others, but this is also a form of hijacking conversations!  I’ve often been guilty of this when talking to my younger son who would then brutally respond by saying “Way to make it about you, mom!”  So with that in mind I would like to gently remind us all that when people speak, let them talk. Listen without interruptions.  This is group give-and-take.  Side conversations belong after the meeting, not in the middle of it.  If those specific comments and questions pertain to the meeting, I encourage you to take your turn and bring those questions/comments up for us all during the course of the evening.  If they have nothing to do with the meeting then those conversations definitely belong after we are adjourned.   When side conversations start occurring, this is the point of group disintegration.    

There is nothing better than being part of inspiring, stimulating group discussions where everyone has a voice and everyone is heard. As different as we are, we have a lot in common – and we have a lot to say on many subjects – we are writers, after all. Opinionated, eccentric, and garrulous – my tribe. God love us.